why

I am 25 years old. at the latest 2 years i am going to have my second child.now my first son is about 14 mounths. having pregnant again wasnt accidently. I didnt use any contraception. here are some reasons.

my husband is about 36 years old, doesnt live in a good way as far as I concern. he smokes,doesnt do exercise at all, goes to any where by car., so his body is away of  moving., he is a workaholic, so he spends most of his time to run his company even at night. he sleeps over midnight.,. and he is suffering from a decease which hasnot found the cure. his neck cant move to right or left side. I am affraid whith this condition he willnot able to move all his ody some day. at least if anybody else at his age still have got 20 years to go to earn money, my husband has got 10 years. at that time my kids need money more to stay at school in the way i have prepared for. ( i want all the est for them, such as study in the best school, supporting their idea, putting them in any kind of course to built their ability in orer to make them ready to be one of the best indonesian people. , and of course it will cost a lot of money. I even want to take to my kids to a couse to increase their middle brain as I see in TV ).

I am the first from 5 brother and sister. we are a very poor family. my father work as a farmer, my mother sews mahcine and make embroidery. Because their thought hasnt go forward , they are short of money all the time . my mother thinks she is the best in any things so no matter how hard I have try to encourage her to be better. my parent doesnt know how to teach their children how to live, how to treat some one else ,how to act in a good way, how to earn money ,. now here we are… poor and being underestimated. lucky me to have a husband like Da boy and his life is completely different than mine. and I find my self  so Far from perfect. I have learnt a lot ever since.  my husband knows very well how to run his own family so I dont have to worry how my life  an my kids life will go on.  But I am the oldest in m family who will take resonsible of my sisters and brothers when my father is no longer able to do it.  in this case I cant ask my husband to pay for my family life.

I want to have my own money, so I can spend it to anything i want. i dont have to woory what my husband will say.

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